Being a teacher.

I was thinking of just being a typical teacher on my first day at school. It means that I just want to go to school in early morning, and come back to home at the evening typically. But my thought was totally wrong. Being a teacher is not an easy thing, yet I'm very thankful for getting the job at this age. I mean, it's too early for me to be a teacher, to teach the kids. I just realized that I'm not only teaching the kids but I'm also being taught so many things.

I learn how to manage my time wisely as I have to intend the lesson for the pupils everytime before I enter the class. I also learn how to control my anger as I have to be as patient as I can, and to prevent my sober mood sometimes. I learn how to be mild. I learn how to swallow the weakness of mine, as I was a lazy person. I was lazy to wake up in the early morning, I was lazy to read any kind of books, yet now I can throw away the laziness. I can learn how to be greatful with every seconds in my day, as I'm too busy right now. I even can think all the memories when I was a kid, a little girl, a primary girl student, when my teachers were trying too hard to make me understand the lesson. When they were trying to sooth us everytime we cry. In fact, I can understand what they were feel, and I can even feel it.

Being a teacher is an awful job, indeed. I'm thankful of being one of them even just for awhile. And now, I'm barely understand why people don't want to be a teacher. For those who will become a future teacher, go run for it. It's wonderful. Frankly typing.

I do love you invariably.

(too!)

I had a cryptic feeling. I even more not understood what is the right word to describe my feeling. I was dozing when I tried to think deeply about this. Again, I dreamt about you but I think it was pretty insane to dream about the same person for two days. After I had a conversation with one of my friends, I realized it was because I eternally love you from the day I met you until now, and I'm still waiting for you to come back no matter what. But I have seldom experienced such feeling, I mean after a year ago. After I got nobody in my miserable life. But you came into my life and you just wanted to choke my sorrow for losing you, love. And I do not know how to express this grateful feeling and I wish there was some way of showing my gratitude for all you have done for me. You're the first person that willing to hear my grief, to hear me crying all over the night. Your labour was appreciated, honestly. But you were merely left me alone here, and you asked me to wait for you. I do not know where is my power to take your word as a challenge. I just even worse now after you suddenly came into my dreams. I really hope you can read this because I've no doubt you feel what I feel.

I think I really miss someone.

I don't know what is this feeling. But frankly, I really do miss someone. I dreamt about you, the person that I really miss now. But I can't remember all of the dream. What I remember is, you look splendid, brilliant in my dream, and that's what you really are. For you, I hope you know who you are. In spite of we're far apart but still you are always remembered as someone that very special. Time is move slowly, dally. Please make it faster. I want to see you solemnly. I want you to come back quickly. I really want you, earnestly.

Change.

Kalaulah semua manusia ada hati yang sama, ada perasaan yang sama tentu takkan wujud masalah misunderstanding. Kalaulah semua manusia saling faham-memahami, pandai berinteraksi dengan baik tentu takkan ada masalah miscommunication. Kalau manusia rambut sama hitam, hati pun sama, mesti masalah-masalah macam ni takkan berlaku. But logically, kalau tak wujud masalah takkan juga wujud perubahan manusia, perubahan peradaban dan perubahan tamadun dunia. Perubahan terjadi kerana wujudnya masalah. Kita memahami konsep bagaimana tamadun dunia berubah setelah kedatangan Islam. Bagaimana juga pertembungan budaya yang pada mulanya adalah satu masalah, berakhir dengan satu perubahan yang nyata. Tapi masalahnya sekarang, adalah perubahan itu sendiri. Perubahan itu yang jadi satu masalah. Ya Allah, I rasa entry ni akan jadi sangat berat and at the end orang takkan baca. Susah. Berubah lah.

Maaf.

I've been too busy since I become a teacher last Monday. I wake up early in the morning at 6.45 am to get ready to go to school. I reach school at 8.00 am almost everyday if the traffic is just okay. I teach the standard 1,2 and 4 for English and Science subjects. I only have Wednesday as the most free day in my timetable. Thursday is the most busy day weekly. I finish at 1.00 pm and I have to handle the pupils to perform solah if the Ustaz goes somewhere else. I start the second session of teaching which is the Kelas Agama session at 2.00 pm. Actually, I don't teach permanently for the second session because I just have to replace if there any teachers absent at that particular time. The second session will be ended at 4 pm everyday, and I continue the third session which is Mengaji. Woohaaa, woohaaa, I teach them mengaji Quran you know. Then, they have to perform solah and the school session will be ended at 5 pm. I free after 5 pm but usually I have to wait for my father to pick me up until almost 6 pm everyday. If the traffic is not too crowded, then my father will reach at 5.30 pm. I reach home at 6.20 pm everyday and it is the earliest time that we can reach home. So, I spend almost my whole day at the school and I will be so tired at night. That's the reason why I will not update the blog everyday except for weekend. Sorry people.

p/s; Kalau lelaki baru nak usha awek apa yang selalu dia buat haaaa? Any ideas?

So, this is about the first day.

Hye people. Actually, I really want to update about my first day as a teacher last night as I promised you in my previous entry. Unluckly, I don't found my usb until just now, after my sister give a little help. So, let me clear cut first about the school's real name. It's Sekolah Integrasi Al-Fikr Bistari, a private school of a friend of my mum. It's just a very small school, that has a very small quantity of students. And fyi, it'a a primary school but still there is a class for pre-school students.

So, this is the Bilik Guru. And the table that has the white bag on the chair is mine.

This is a part of the Bilik Guru. Er err, saje je nak tunjukk.

And and, this is the cutest library ever. Awwwww, I really love this view. Oh well, I snapped the picture after everybody back home. T____T

This is one of the class for primary students. I think the classes there are comfortable because each classes have aircond.

And this is another view that I like about this school. The class for pre-school student. Sooo cute.

Okay, continue. Well, I'm teaching English and Science subjects instead of Pendidikan Islam. So, stop calling me ustazah and please call me teacher instead. Because the headmaster of the school asked me to teach English subject after he looks at my SPM's results. Ouchhh. Haha. So, the good thing here is about the students. Since, it's a private school so it's easy to handle a small quantity of pupils. They are willing to obey my order, and it's easy to me to recognize each of them. Well, the bad things are I have to write the summary of the subject once I finished the teaching and learning process and I think I always feel sleepy everytime I have no class to teach. Poor me, because I only have to teach one or two classes per day. And I become more sleepy. So, I think I have to bring any kind of reading sources to avoid this kind of feeling. Oh, I think I want to do some revision for MUET everytime I don't have the class. Awww, good idea. Daaa, I want to continue playing farmville.

Teacher to-be.

Alhamdulillah, mum just told me that I can start my job as a teacher by tomorrow morning. I am too exciting but do nervous in the same time. Being a teacher is not an easy thing I guess, betul tak Dyla and Fifa? Well, I am too bad because I forgot the full name of the school but the location of the school is at TTDI, Shah Alam. And yes, I bet you guys will laugh because I am going to teach Science and Pendidikan Islam subjects. Wooohaa, ustazah ustazah. No, I would not let them to call me ustazah. So the class starts at 8 am as usual and will be ended at 4 pm because I need to continue with the Kelas Kafa. Biasalah, sekolah swasta. But it's okay, at least I'll gain the experience as Fifa said. Er err, just I'm confusing about my career. Lawyer, Psychologist, Teacher, or maybe Housewife. Haha, annoying.

Well, the most thing that I'm worried about is the students. Yes, I love kids but it's hard to handle and to manage them. I think I've to be more patience, no anger. Come one Rda, you can do it. And I'm thinking of wearing baju kurung for the whole day for a month or for 2 months perhaps, and how about the preparation before the teaching and learning process. I've to little bit touch up on my face, because this is about the perception of the kids. Er err, how about of being a good model for the students? I mean, a teacher is an idol. Woohaaa, it's the hardest thing ever because kids will follow the older. Homaigod homaigod. Seriously, I'm nervous. But it's okay, just wait and see what will happen tomorrow, my first day.

So people, as usual please pray for my very best. I want to be a good teacher, and I will report about my first day tomorrow.

p/s; I'm thinking of what I'm going to wear for tomorrow morning. Simple but looks good for their first impression. Babe, this is self management. Ingat tak psychology? Haha.
p/ss; Perlu tidur awal, supaya tidak menguap-nguap di dalam kelas dan kelihatan segar!
p/sss; Gila nervous aku ni. T____T

Lelaki tak suka.

I just came back from Kopitiam Geylang and I was thinking about what are the things that the boys don't like because I got many feedback regarding the previous entry especially respond dari perempuan-perempuan cantik. Semua pakat nak suruh boyf baca. Jadi untuk mengelakkan self-serving bias disebabkan I ni adalah seorang perempuan, I buat satu entry khas tentang apa yang lelaki tak suka. Jadi kepada anda, perempuan-perempuan cantik silalah take note from this entry. Because we have to change our selves if we want others to change theirs.

1. Lelaki sangat tak suka kalau perempuan yang over sensitive. Buat sikit, dah nak menangis. Buat sikit, dah nak merajuk. Sebab perempuan kena faham, mostly lelaki sangat suka bergurau senda. Memang sometimes gurauan diorang tu melebih-lebih. Tapi sebagai perempuan cantik, kita kena cool. Payah lah kalau sikit-sikit nak menangis, sikit-sikit nak merajuk. Jangan sampai satu tahap, lelaki buat bodoh je dengan you all. Serious memanjang, sebab takut you all merajuk. It looks dull. Dah lah susah nak pujuk. Lagi panas hati ahhh.

2. Lelaki tak suka kalau kau asyik nak compare dia dengan your ex boyfriends. Especially kalau bab wang ringgit. Sebab kau faham-faham lah, lelaki ni pantang di cabar. Kalau kau asyik nak tunjuk barang-barang yang ex kau bagi sampai dia kena bagi more than that, I rasa mula-mula memang dia boleh bagi tapi lama-lama mesti dia akan menyampah dan suruh kau couple balik dengan ex kau tu. Cuba kalau encik lelaki buat benda yang sama dekat kau, mesti kau melenting kan kan? Bersyukurlah wahai perempuan-perempuan sekalian.

3. Lelaki tak suka perempuan yang all the time nak berkepit. Kita kena faham, lelaki ni kan simple. Semua benda pun kalau boleh, encik lelaki nak biasa-biasa je. *Eh eh, ada jugak yang suka berkepit, but I write based on my observation.* Lelaki mana larat nak layan kau 24/7. Nak message taknak berhenti, nak bergayut tiap masa. Bosan bosan bosan. Sebab tu banyak kes bila boyfriend tak reply message terus nak merajuk. Err, tapi kalau dah selalu sangat tak reply memang wajib marah ahhh.

4. Lelaki tak suka kalau kau mengata kawan kau depan dia, sebab kau akan nampak sangat bodoh. Lelaki ni open minded tapi kalau bab kawan, diorang sangat prihatin. Sebab tu most of them lagi pentingkan kawan-kawan dari girlf sendiri. So, bila kau memburuk-burukkan kawan kau sendiri kat depan your boyf, mesti dia akan ada negative perception about you.

5. Lelaki tak suka perempuan yang panas baran. Nak nak lagi kalau lelaki tu jenis yang abang macho. Kalau kau marah dia dengan suara yang tinggi, confirm ah dia reject kau. Wahai perempuan, ingat! We have to respect man because they still will be our leader. I memang suka highlight pasal leadership ni. Sebab I betul tak suka kalau perempuan control lelaki. I pun tak suka, apatah lagi lelaki kan kan.

6. Lelaki memang tak suka perempuan yang jenis mengungkit. Especially kalau girlf sendiri nak mengungkit benda-benda lama, apa yang dia pernah buat, apa yang dia sacrifice. Memang, perempuan rasa macam kita just nak ingatkan lelaki instead of mengungkit tapi cara kita tu kadang-kadang tak kena. Jangan sampai si boyf bosan dan end-up dengan bergaduh.

7. Lelaki tak suka perempuan yang ego, yang susah nak mengaku silap sendiri. Kalau boleh nak letak semua kesalahan tu kat lelaki. Memang buat si boyf panas hati ahhh, especially kalau dah memang tu salah si girlf tapi taknak mengaku. Siap tuduh-tuduh si boyf lagi. Kita kena faham, lelaki ni dah lah memang ego. Kalau kita ego jugak memang susah lahhh. Api kan tak boleh dengan api. Perempuan, janganlah ego sangat. Kita kan jiwa lembut *gelimat*, tapi jangan sampai kena pijak sudah.

8. Yeah yeahhh, lelaki tak suka perempuan berleter dan kuat jealous yea. Especially kalau berleter pasal benda yang remeh temeh. Contohnya kalau lambat 3 minit, dah nak berleter sampai satu hari. Lepas tu mengungkit lagi. Lepas tu, kalau dah berleter mestilah muka kerut-kerut. Tak yah lah, tak comel. Er er, tapi kena jugak berleter in certain situation. Haha. Bab jealous lagi tak payah cerita. Lelaki akan rimas bila in everything kau nak syak wasangka dengan dia, sebab kau jealous kalau dia layan perempuan lain. Gila lahhh, I pun rimas.

9. Lelaki tak suka perempuan yang dependant on people. Semua benda nak harap orang yang tolong. Kalau boleh nak makan pun, nak kena si boyf yang suapkan. Hokeh hokeh, contoh melampau. Tapi memang lebih kurang lahhh. Sumpah lah menyampah. Tapi I pelik jugak sebab ada lelaki yang sanggup pegangkan handbang untuk si girlf, macam lah berat sangat. Come one girls, be independent. Baru lah hot.

10. Last but not least, lelaki tak suka perempuan yang terlalu nak tahu apa yang lelaki buat. Busy body lah senang cerita. Yang jenis kalau boleh setiap masa si boyf kena report dia nak pergi mana, nak buat apa. Yang kalau boleh nak check everything about the boyf. Kawan dengan siapa, nak check wall facebook lagi, jangan ada comment perempuan lain. Nak check inbox setiap hari. Semua benda ahh nak check. Konon detail lahh. Padahal diri sendiri pun lebih kurang je. Rimas rimas.

Jadi kepada perempuan-perempuan sekalian jom, move to be a better woman. Er er, sorry I memang tak pakar dah hal-hal lelaki. Maaf ye lelaki-lelaki sekalian. (^_^")

Perempuan tak suka.

Sekarang I dah kat Terengganu. Baru je sampai then I terus online. Risau tanaman I layu pulak kalau tak harvest. Susah jugak jadi petani moden ni. Tapi apakan daya, that's my choice. So kena lah tanggung akibatnya. Okay lah, stop bercakap pasal farmville kesayangan I. Sekarang, mood untuk menaip entry macam dulu dah datang balik. First maybe sebab sekarang tengah free, cuti semester, tak tahu nak buat apa. Budak-budak ni tengah main bola tengah-tengah panas. Biarlah. So, daripada I duduk termenung mengadap farmville, baik I jadi pakar pyschology sekejap. Okay, back to the topic above. I tak tahu lah whether pendapat I ni betul atau tidak sebab I make it based on my observation pada beberapa orang kawan. Maaf, anda jadi bahan experiment saya. Haha. Okay, kepada lelaki-lelaki sekian sila take note dari entry ni. Sebab I nak cerita satu persatu apa yang perempuan tak suka mengenai seorang lelaki.

1. Perempuan tak suka bila lelaki terlalu romantic. I mean, lelaki yang nak cakap 'I love you' all the time. Lelaki yang setiap kali on call mesti nak cakap romantic-romantic. Perlahan, sampai sumpah kena pay fully attention. Kepada lelaki, cuba jadi funny dan kecoh sikit. Baru boleh gelak-gelak. I like. *Eh eh, ni dah macam observe diri sendiri je. Haha.*

2. Perempuan tak suka bila dia tengah cakap lepas tu lelaki gelak-gelak. Selalu terjadi masa bergayut ah ni. Kalau si girlfriend baru nak cerita pasal diri dia, time tu lah kau nak berborak dengan roommates or housemates kau macam dah setahun tak jumpa. Haishhh, pantang betul. Encik lelaki pun, mesti tak suka kalau you all tengah cakap then girlfriend you all cakap dengan orang lain kan? *Angguk cepatttt!* So, janganlah buat okayyy. :)

3. Perempuan tak suka kalau setiap kali keluar mesti nak tengok wayang, makan, tengok wayang, makan. *Tak tahulah kalau ada perempuan yang suka.* Ehemm, bosan lah kalau do the same thing. Nak nak lagi, kalau yang selalu keluar. Mesti time kali ke-30 keluar kau dah start bosan towards each other. So lelaki, be creative. Apa kata ajak your girlfriend pergi karaoke pulak. Hahaha. My favourite. *sekali lagi observe diri sendiri. T____T

4. Perempuan tak suka kalau lelaki yang terlampau manja dengan parents dia. Sebab sifat manja kau tu akan terbawak-bawak dalam relationship. Maka bila terbawak, terpaksa lah si girlfriend yang manja-manjakan kau. Haishh, mana boleh. Sebab bila kau buat macam tu, sumpah annoying sebab nanti si girlfriend nak manja-manja dengan siapa? Tu yang jadi girlfriend cari orang lain tu. Tapi kalau dah manjakan girlfriend pun jangan lah sampai kena pijak kepala. Give and take are the best things.

5. Perempuan tak suka lelaki yang tak habis-habis nak ceritakan kisah hidup dia. Si girlfriend baru nak bukak mulut cerita pasal diri sendiri kau dah potong, nak sambung episod semalam yang kau tak habis cerita tu. Mana boleh macam tu. Sebab nanti si girlfriend akan rasa sangat bosan dan useless ada boyfriend macam kau. Baik tak payah ada boyfriend kalau takde orang yang boleh nak dengar cerita kita. Tak gitu?

6. Perempuan tak suka lelaki yang kedekut. Itu yang pasti. Jangan lah kedekut sangat sampai makan pun berkira dengan girlfriend sendiri. Tapi jangan ahh setiap kali keluar, kau yang nak keluar duit. Kering ahhh, nak nak yang still belajar lagi. Duit sendiri pun parents yang bagi. Haha. Sekali-sekala apa salahnya kala share. One more, jangan mintak perempuan belanja kau sebab nampak kau tak bertanggungjawab. Tapi kalau dah memang dia nak belanja, sapu je.

7. Perempuan tak suka lelaki yang jenis menyumpah seranah segala benda keluar setiap kali bergaduh. Relax sudah, kata lelaki ni cool. So janganlah emosional kalau gaduh dengan girlfriend. Show your professional to face the problem. Sebab kalau kau emo, perempuan lagi 2 kali ganda emo. Maka terjadi lah perang besar. Janganlah keluar kata-kata keji hina dina kau tu. Tak hensem ahhh.

8. Perempuan tak suka kalau boyfriend dia contact dengan ex dia. Yang ni I pun tak faham kenapa. Sebab selalunya I biarkan je. Hahaha. Tapi mungkin si girlfriend ada sebab sendiri untuk tidak suka. Mungkin kau ni hot sangat, so dia takut lah perempuan tu rampas kau balik. Takpun mungkin kau ni jenis yang gatal-gatal. So, perempuan ayat sikit dah cair macam ais.

9. Perempuan tak suka lelaki yang takde pendirian, yang tak boleh nak buat decision. You have to show your leadership. Baru lah perempuan suka. Think about your future sebab kalau kau dapat perempuan yang matured lagi parah. Sebab diorang akan fikir pasal future. Kalau dalam love relationship pun kau tak boleh handle apatah lagi di alam perkahwinan. Amboiii jauhnya. Haha.

10. Last but not least, sebab I dah penat nak menaip. Perempuan tak suka make the first move. Sebab nanti nampak macam perempuan yang terkejar-kejar. Buat malu je. Betul, ini stereotype. But you have to accept this. Kalau kau yang buat first move, sumpah machoooo gila. :)

Okay lah kawan-kawan. These are just my opinion, kalau silap jangan marah-marah ehhh. I want yours too. :)

The various reasons, why I am still single.

I think you should read this, so lepas ni tak payah lagi you nak tanya the same question to me. Sebab memang tu yang you fikir even I bagi different answer kan kan.

Comment 1 : Aku rasa hang ni single sebab hang ni jenis yang ada pendirian. Hang selalu tegas kalau buat keputusan. So, hang kena lah dapat lelaki yang lagi tegas. Tu yang payah nak carik tuuu.

Haa, I setuju jugak lah dengan comment yang ni. *masuk bakul, angkat sendiri ni.* Tapi betul apa, sebab I rasa I tak suka lelaki yang harapkan I buat desicion in certain situation. Sebab kala lelaki harapkan pendapat perempuan without giving theirs first, it doesn't show their leadership. Ingat, lelaki tetap ketua dalam relationship even girlfriend kau gagah macam mana sekali pun. No excuses.

Comment 2 : Sebab ni lah kau single. *Aku buat-buat tak dengar sambil sambung mengarut.*

Like seriously, I mengaku yang I memang sangat kuat mengarut. Merepek-repek tak tentu pasal sampai tak ingat dunia. But it is not because of my loneliness. Tolong sikit, kau ingat aku desperate ke. Ni memang sebab I suka mengarut lahh. Masa ada boyf dulu pun I mengarut jugak apa. Kalau dah tak larat nak layan, means that you can't totally accept the real me.

Comment 3 : Kau terlampau hot untuk couple. *Haaa, bukan I yang cakap.*

Ahhh, apa yang kau mengarut entah. I memang suka perasan HOT. Sebab setiap kata-kata kan doa. Sampai sekarang melekat orang panggil Rda Hot. Padahal I yang start. T___T

Comment 4 : Lelaki mana yang berani nak couple dengan debater macam kau.

Hey hey hey lelaki sekalian. Jangan ingat bila I ni debater, I banyak cakap maka I akan jadi queen control. Sebab I boleh jadi selembut yang boleh dengan lelaki yang I sayang. *ouchhhh, gelimat pula.*

Comment 5 : Kau ni takde orang nak ke, memang kau picky? Memilih sangat kott.

Eh eh, I tak memilih okayyy. Memang dah takde orang nak kat I, kalau I memilih mesti I tak pernah couple sampai sekarang. Nobody's perfect. I know that.

Comment 6 : Sebab kau garang sangat kottt.

I garang ke? Perhaps, in certain situation. Sebab I boleh jadi orang yang sangat emosional bila I betul-betul into that thing. Jangan terkejut bila tengok I menangis. Sebab masa tu you all akan lupa, I ni garang.

Comment 7 : We need someone that can control us. Supaya kita tak jadi queen control! Haha.

I do agreen with this statement. Sebab orang yang share the same feeling dengan I ni pun dah ada partner. And yes, her partner really can control her as she wish. Sebab tu lah, wahai kaum lelaki tolong jangan kalah dengan wanita. Anda harus control the relationship. Not us. I tak nak jadi queen control. Nanti nampak tua. *Macam bodoh je alasan tua tuuu.* Okay sebenarnya I taknak tengok lelaki jatuhkan martabat kerana seorang perempuan. *ehem ehem, more matured.*

Comment 8 : Cuba lah memondan sikit. Jantan sangat, lelaki takut nak dekat.

I tak lah jantan sangat punnn. Tengok situation lah. Kadang-kadang I boleh jadi perempuan yang sangat gedik sampai kau pun boleh annoying.

Comment 9 : Sebab kau busy woman. T_____T

WTH alasan macam ni. So, lelaki perlu lah menjadi 'more busy man'.

Comment 10 : Kau ni high taste lahh. Mana lah kau nak dapat lelaki macam tu. *haishh, ada jugak kata I tasteless.*

No No No. I tidak lah high taste. I suka lelaki yang biasa-biasa saja. Yang penting, awak boleh lead saya. *Wekk, gelimat gelimat sebentarrrrr.*

Okay okay, cukup 10 I rasa. I macam tak tahu nak respond apa bila teringat balik comments from the other people about why I'm being single until now. But fyi, sebenarnya baru 9 bulan I single. Tak sampai setahun pun lagi. So, takde lah lama sangat pun membujang. Relax sudahhh. Tak yah tanya-tanya lahhh. Hahaha.

The most favourite comment among others is;

"Rda, kau ni memang cantik tapi aku rasa kecantikan sebenar kau is your inside."

Ouch ouchhh. I nak berangan kejap.

p/s; Sumpah I rasa entry ni macam nak promote diri sendiri. Dah dah, jangan nak keji aku. Hahaha.
p/ss; Haishh, lama jugak tak type panjang-panjang macam ni.

Damn!

Memang nak mencarut ahhh. Laptop tak boleh on. Kena tunggu habis cuti sem baru dapat on agaknya. Dah dua kali I tunggu sampai tertidur. Seriously I bengang gila. Hantar service center tah apa yang korang buat. What the hell lah. Sumpah memang aku bengang gila. Then, nak on Facebook sebab I dah risau gila dengan tanaman 16 hours yang I tanam malam tadi mesti dah nak mati pucuk. Memang siot lah tiba-tiba tak boleh bukak. Ada ke kau kata password aku salah. Padahal aku ingat password aku lahh. Dah lebih kurang 100 kali dah I nak log in tak lepas. Dan sekarang terpaksa reset password dan bertambah malang bila password email pulak aku tak ingat. Memang dah hentam sebanyak lebih 10 kali sampai email tu kena locked. Memang mati ahh tanaman aku tak sempat nak harvest. Apa hal tah si Facebook ni nak carik gaduh dengan aku. Dah lah cuti sem baru start memang nak kena maki ahhh kalau kena buat account baru lepas tu kena main farmville dari first level balik. Somebody help me please. Memang semua orang dengki ke I dah habis second semester sampai buat I macam ni. Dah lah belum mandi ni. Hasihh, sumpah sakit hati aku. Pissed off.

I didn't expect, this is the end.

Seriously, lama gila tak update blog ni sejak I busy dengan final exam. And yes people, I have finished my last paper today at evening. And of course lah semua orang nak melompat macam orang gila bila dah hantar last paper and dapat keluar dari dewan. I think Law's paper is not too bad because I can answer all the questions. Tinggal betul atau salah je lah. So, bila dah lama tak update ni memang sumpah banyak gila benda nak cerita. Kalau boleh semua gambar I nak upload tapi takpe lah, kang blog ni jadi flickr.com pulak. So, the first thing to tell is about Anam's Birthday. Last Wednesday after having Psychology paper we went to Village Mall to celebrate Anam's birthday. Ceh, I rasa macam dah buat essay darjah 6 lah pulak. Actually, kitorang plan benda tanpa pengetahuan Anam. After having the lunch at KFC and Chocolate Indulgence as the dessert we went to Village Mall for having the karaoke session and it was the best thing. Haa, tengok lah gambar. Malas nak taip nak tengok Datuk Lee Chong Wei lawan Japan kejap.

Haaa, gambar last tu takyah terkejut lahh sebab time tu lepas tension baru habis paper Psychology. Lepas tu dah ah macam tak sedar diri pakai baju kurung siap ajak kawan-kawan jum tangkap gambar lompat-lompat. Lepas tu macam syok sendiri pun ada sebab lombat sorang-sorang. Eh, Ayie dengan Anaz pun lompat jugak ah. Tapi kalau perempuan memang sorang-sorang yang lompat. Mesti kau yang dok tengok ni geleng kepala tak berhenti sebab I pakai baju kurung. Dah senyap ah. Memang nak bebel satu entry pun. T___T

So, the second thing to tell is about Hari Kecemerlangan SBP (HKSBP) dari 11 March hingga 14 March kat Sekolah Sains Sultan Muhamad Jiwa. So, I decided to go there after Anaz asked me to follow him untuk tengok debat. Mula-mula memang ah macam taknak pegi sebab bukan ada sekolah I pun, sebab sekolah I bukan SBP. Tapi macam kesian pulak kat Anaz *sorry, I tipu.* Then teman lah Anaz selama dua hari. Lepas tu banyangkan tak tidur 2 hari siang dan malam kecuali masa budak laki pergi sembahyang Jumaat kat Masjid Sungai Petani memang muka macam zombie ahh sebab tak cukup tidur. Mata macam dah boleh sangkut hanger yang ada baju batik UiTM dahh. Lepas tu bajet nak study kat KFC tapi tiba-tiba KFC yang sepatutnya 24 hours nak tutup pukul 2. Memang dengki betul KFC ni orang baru dapat mood nak study. Alasan tutup sebab nak sembur racun. Time time tu lahhh nak sembur. Haishhh, tak puas hati betul. Then sambung study kat SEMUJI tapi memang harapan ahh dapat study sebab yang I buat adalah tidur sambil melihat Akmal dan Leya study. Then balik UiTM sampai pukul 8 pagi, konon nak pegi bengkel Muet pukul 10. Balik terus mandi sebab I betul nak pegi apa, tapi konon nak tidur sekejap sementara tunggu Nat siap sekali terlajak tidur sampai pukul 4 petang tanpa sedar. Bangun-bangun terus makan, then study sebab esoknya ada paper Law. Maknanya hari ni ahhh. So sekarang memang tengah mengarut kat blog sambil mengarut dengan Bulan kat Facebook sebab hati ni memang dah tak sabar nak balik. Yeay, esok balik!

Kesimpulannya, I tak tolong roommates kemas bilik pun sebab tengah usaha siapkan entry ni. Malaysia macam menang je malam ni untuk final All England sebab Lee Chong Wei dah menang satu round. *berdosa tak kalau tak letak datuk? I mean, kena tangkap tak? Haha.

p/s; Baru perasan title takde kena mengena dengan entry. Lupa pulak nak type. Hahhaa.

No Title for this, I guess.

Seriously, I was almost crazy when I answered the MTC038 paper. It was so bad. I don't know what to say. Fortunately, everybody said the same thing. At least, I'm not the only one who suffered by the paper. Well, I'm now fighting for MTC039 paper which is Psychology paper and I wish I can do much much better for this paper. Please, pray for me. :)

Well, I want to promote my friend's blog shop in this entries. And perhaps I can get the commission by doing this. Haha, I'm just kidding. He is selling various types of shawl and vintage materials. So people, do visit http://nazerulmerci.blogspot.com/ now! :) Here is the picture of the blog.

One more thing, last week there was an Expo in UiTM Kedah. Anaz and I got our own portraits drawing drawn by a bro at one of the stall of the expo. :) *Batak batak.

This is Anaz. The owner of the blog shop that I have mentioned above. :)

p/s; Tomorrow is Anam's Birthday. Happy Birthday babe. :)
p/ss; Good luck to Anaz for the paper tomorrow. :)
p/sss; A video is uploading in the facebook people. :)

Awesome! - Bad effects

This is so fun. I can't stop playing this until now. Thanks roommate Zalila for introducing me this website. It's totally awesome. Take a look people at looklet.com. You will addicted to this.

*enlarge by clicking. :)

I think I should stop playing this. I mean, I have to focus on my study and revision. I need to finish my reading. I have to stop this. People, I mean take a look at this after your final exam.T________T

I nak kahwin!

Like seriously, I rasa macam nak kahwin sekarang jugak. I mean, sekarang! Memanglah umur I baru 19 tahun, tu pun tak masuk lagi 19 tahun. Tapi kisah apa, zaman mak-mak and nenek-nenek kita dulu boleh je kahwin umur 16-19. So, apa salahnya kan? Lepas tu imagine pulak dapat husband yang hot dan sexy. Kaya, boleh lah. Yang penting, I nak yang messy! Barulah nampak sexy. Haisshhh, memang tak boleh nak focus study kalau asyik berangan kahwin dengan lelaki-lelaki hot. Tapi study jugak lah jadi main factor kenapa I rasa nak kahwin sekarang jugak. Tension tension.


Kalau lah dapat si Remy Ishak yang betul-betul, sumpah I tak keluar rumah. I'll treat him 24/7 non stop. Hahahaha. Takpe, I sanggup jadi full-time housewife demi suami tercinta. Gila hot lah lelaki ni, sexy pulak tu.
Yea, awak sangat messy sebab tu awak hensem and sexy. Kalau dapat ni, sumpah tak cari lain. And seriously, kalau tak dapat the real Remy Ishak tapi ada iras-iras pun I tak kisah. Er er, nak awak yang dalam Nur Kasih tu boleh? Heee T____T Gila gatal I ni.

Atau mungkin ada rezeki lebih sikit boleh dapat husband macam Gerard Butler. Gila hot dalam P/s; I love you! dengan The Ugly Truth. Tengok tengok, sangat hensem dan messy kan? Kalau dapat husband macam ni, siang malam I nak tatap muka dia. Taknak bagi dia keluar rumah langsung ni.

Sebab Gerard Butler sangat sexy okay! Perempuan yang tak cair tengok Gerard Butler ni memang something wrong lah kan. Haha. Tapi yang dah cair, back off okay. I nak berangan dia jadi husband I. Tapi macam over la kan, sebab I rasa I lagi suka lelaki-lelaki Melayu. So, Gerard Butler hanyalah angan-angan.

Jeng jeng jeng! Ini dia calon suami terakhir, encik Fahrin Ahmad! Wahhhh, sangat hensem, hot, dan sweet. Dah lah baik gila kan, lantak lah kalau perempuan lain tak suka kat you tapi I still nak berangan you jadi husband I. Hahaha.

Dan sekarang I dan tak tahu nak pilih yang mana satu untuk jadi husband. Macam mana nak kahwin ni? Nak tiga-tiga boleh? Tolonglah datang meminang I sekarang jugak. I nak buat solat istikharah ni *Macam lah diorang nak. T___T

p/s; inilah akibat study terlalu banyak. *erk. ;p
p/ss; supposedly kena pergi forum malam ni, tapi er er faham-faham lah.

Come back please.

Aku betul tak tahu kalau kau rasa ni masih salah aku. Atau mungkin ini memang salah aku, dari dulu. Sampai kita jadi macam ni, maksud aku kita dah tak macam dulu. Macam kita masa kita baru kenal dulu, masa kita baru berkongsi semua benda. Aku betul rasa tak guna bila kita jadi macam ni. Sebab aku dapat rasa ini memang salah aku. Atau aku sorang je yang rasa benda ni, sedangkan kau tak pernah terfikir? Atau mungkin aku yang terlalu emosi bila bercerita soal ini.

Yea, aku bukan kuat seperti selalu. Bila soalnya adalah tentang hati dan perasaan, sukar untuk aku kawal satu persatu. Aku bukan sedih sebab aku tiada sesiapa lagi. Aku bukan sedih sebab kau dah ada hidup sendiri. Tapi aku sedih sebab aku dah takde kau lagi, kau yang dulu. Aku sedih sebab aku rasa aku dah cuba sebaik mungkin untuk pulihkan hubungan kita ni. Aku sedih sebab aku tak mampu jadi yang terbaik untuk kau. Aku sedih sebab aku dah tak boleh nak buat kau senyum atau ketawa macam dulu lagi. Aku sedih sebab kita dah jauh, terlalu jauh.

Kalau kau rasa apa yang aku rasa, tolonglah bantu aku dalam menyelamatkan hubungan kita. Kalau kau rindu apa yang aku rindu, marilah kita cari kerinduan tu sama-sama. Kalau kau mahu apa yang aku mahu tolonglah datang pada aku, aku ingin kongsi rasa itu. Aku tidak mahu lebih, aku mahu kau yang dulu. Dan aku harap kau juga rindu aku yang dulu. Sebab dulu, kita bersatu.

p/s; Yea, aku sangat lemah dalam hal ini. Doakan aku diberi kekuatan dari Allah. Amin.
p/ss; Entry beremosi memang akan guna 'aku'. So, jangan persoalkan.
p/sss; Kau pernah tak rasa macam hidup sorang-sorang walaupun orang sekeliling ramai?
p/ssss; Jangan tanya aku soalan, "Entry ni untuk siapa?"

I miss you!

You can laugh when you reading this entry. You can laugh when you looking to my old picture with that scarf. You can laugh when you knowing that I'm not in a stable condition. But like seriously, I really miss these two important people in my life. My sweethearts, my soul mates, my best friends for forever. I want them to be beside me badly.

Thanks for everything people, I'll always remember you guys as the best persons in my life. We got too many memories together and it were unforgettable memories ever. You guys are reminding me to the school's memories. We spent our time together, we went for outing together and we did everything together. And now, I really miss that moment. The moment when we
argued to each other, the moment when we played the volley ball together, the moment when we skipped the classes together. Thanks so much for being you in my life and I really need you guysin my current life.


Nur Shafira, but I call her Kak Ya is the best person ever. We always meet each other even though we're now in different place. She's the one who really understand me and she's always fulfill my desires especially when I ask her to sleepover in my house. Thanks so much Kak Ya.

This is Farah Dayana, and I call her Telur. Don't laughing at her nickname because it's freaking cute. There's a long time ago I haven't seen her but we still contacting via Facebook and I miss her badly. I love you.

p/s; Now, you know how much I love my friends including you.
p/ss; I feel release now.
p/sss; Happy Birthday Que. :)

Hati batu, keras kepala

Like seriously, I baru sedar semua ni. Sejak masuk tahun 2010 ni I rasa I memang seorang yang hati batu, keras kepala, ego nak mampus compare dengan dulu. Sekarang memang sangat susah untuk dengar I respon bila kawan-kawan luah perasaan. Susah nak tengok I interested bila kawan-kawan bercerita hal masing-masing. Paling tidak pun sepatah dua je yang keluar dari mulut I like "Oh, yeke." Atau pun I hanya angguk-angguk or geleng-geleng. Gelak pun macam dah tak ikhlas setiap kali kawan-kawan buat lawak bodoh, yang dulunya I pun join sekaki buat lawak.

I baru sedar yang I keras kepala, susah nak mengalah bila ada argument on opinion dengan kawan-kawan. Susah nak mengaku kesalahan sendiri even it's clearly my faults. Dan yang paling annoying bila sekarang ni sesuka hati je nak sound kawan-kawan directly, macam orang lain takde hati dan perasaan. Sekarang memang sangat susah I nak puji kawan-kawan even dalam hati I sangat bangga dengan diorang. Sekarang susah nak cakap yang I sangat sayang semua kawan-kawan even hati I menjerit nak bagi tahu satu dunia. Yea, I love all of you so much.

And I really don't know what is happening to my self. Kenapa I jadi kejam macam ni? Seriously, I tak tahu. Kawan-kawan I'm really sorry for every mistakes that I had done to you guys. Help me to change my self back please. I really need all of you.

p/s; Tinggal Law paper sahaja untuk test. :)
p/ss; Eh, dah bulan March lahhh. :)